Day 3 of The Kindness Challenge

Today, replace any "why doesn't he ever ..." thoughts (which are often unrealistic), with thoughts that answer the question: "What does he do that makes me feel special, valued, or loved?" Then, sometime today, tell him what he does that makes you feel special. For example:

• "Thanks for standing up for me in that awkward meeting at church."

• "When you hold the door open for me I feel special – and I love it that you set that example for our son."

• "It makes me feel safe and protected when you lock the doors at night."

Coach's Corner:

When we lose perspective, we tend to focus on his "wrongs," and miss his "rights." We grumble or get exasperated—just a few of the negative patterns that keep us from kindness.

What is your unrecognized negativity pattern? Arguing? Exasperation? Venting? Or something else?

See Chapter 6 of The Kindness Challenge for the seven different types of negativity, and catalog which ones you have a tendency to do – and need to work on during these 30 days.