Day 4 of The Kindness Challenge

What is one thing your husband probably likes about himself – but perhaps believes that you don't? (His strong opinions, which you see as being uncompromising; His ability to go with the flow, which you see as never being on time; his interest in racing, when you wish he would pick a different hobby...) Today, compliment him in the area he thinks you dislike. ("I saw how you were so willing to stop what you were doing when Kayla needed to talk; I could learn from your flexibility.") Bonus points if you can do it in print (a note, an email...) that he can look back on just to be sure you did indeed say that! If you are giving a journal, put in a copy of that note.

Coach's Corner:

Often in marriage we have defenses up about those areas where we know our spouse disapproves. We build walls. The research found that when you are kind about those areas where your spouse expects disapproval it melts through those walls. (In other words: Kindness is a superpower! See Chapter 2 for the other superpowers kindness gives you.)

Coach's Checkup:

How are you doing at tackling each of the three Challenge elements each day? Be careful not to think of these daily hints as the Challenge itself. They are simply helpful ideas for doing one of the three elements – saying nothing negative, saying words of praise and doing an act of generosity.